[ if mephisto is hung over today, he isn't showing it! he is, however, currently chilling with a black donkin' dunnts coffee in the dark, quiet back room of the planetarium. probably unrelated. ]
Why would you want to be popular with the women? [SQUINTS...] A bigger dog would be cooler, anyway. And it could do a lot more than just bite people's ankles if you got into a fight like that.
[He still thinks tiny dogs are inefficient in this very hypothetical scenario he's made up, but— he's getting interrupted! Specifically by the screen coming to life again.]
[Making such a face at the blank screen, cringing. Past!Hunter is giving middle school MySpace profile.]
I was the Emperor's right hand man. Which, as you just saw, means I was a raging jerk. And they stole and lost a lot of money from one of the Emperor's ships, so...
Anyone who wants the role is crazy. [Immediately. He crosses his arms, frowning at the now blank screen.] ... I was a scout first, then I ascended through the ranks and was given the role. But... I guess it's not inaccurate to say I was raised for it, too.
[When Mephisto enters the Home Biome, the first thing he might notice is rhythmic thump, thump, thump of a gigantic, beating heart overhead. The second might be the fact that he's found himself in some kind of throne room, dimly lit and covered in pipes. Sometimes one of the pipes hisses, releasing a hot burst of steam. The ominous mooks are not included, of course.
Meanwhile, Hunter is standing near the staircase leading up to the throne, looking very much like he wants to set the whole room on fire.]
Hey, Mephisto. Hunter is just standing here looking at the gift shop kigus like he's considering committing acts of unspeakable kigu violence. Flapjack softly warbles at him from where he's perched on his shoulder.]
In fairness — though it doesn't excuse the oversight — this situation seems to have been different from any we'd encountered previously. Having more than two people awake with only one death wasn't an idea we'd had to give much thought to.
... And we got too used to a confession happening in the last hour, too. I guess that now we know more than two people can be involved in a single murder. But it shouldn't have come to this for us to learn our lesson.
It shouldn't have... but since that isn't something we can change now, learning our lesson is the best we can do. We know more now than we did before, and that, at least, is valuable.
Oh, it's a silly human thing. Drinking during the day is largely frowned upon and 5 PM when most get off work is considered the acceptable start time. "It's 5 o'clock somewhere" is a joking way of brushing off any criticism about drinking earlier in the day, as it's true that it is always after 5 PM in a time zone somewhere in the world.
[ the pinkish bubblegum-scented drink he'd ordered a moment ago shows up on the counter in front of him, and he slides the menu over to hunter. ]
...Anyway, there's your human cultural lesson for the day.
week 0, thursday
no subject
... Oh, hey.
[Shielding his eyes from the viewing window. Help.]
week 3, monday
speaking of not-dogs — ]
no subject
so much to unpack here.
help.
okay but first--]
... Satan has a kid?
no subject
[ he can probably infer who the second one is from context! ]
Only one really inherited the demon part, though.
no subject
no subject
no subject
no subject
no subject
no subject
[ because tits, hunter. ]
If I was going to get in a serious fight, I'd stop being a dog.
no subject
[He does not yet have the grand titty vision.]
Okay. Sure. But what if you were in a situation where you couldn't stop being a dog?
no subject
If I was already a dog, that would mean my powers were functioning normally, in which case that wouldn't be an issue.
no subject
[He still thinks tiny dogs are inefficient in this very hypothetical scenario he's made up, but— he's getting interrupted! Specifically by the screen coming to life again.]
no subject
...I have to say I'm glad you ditched the gold mask, but what was that about?
no subject
I was the Emperor's right hand man. Which, as you just saw, means I was a raging jerk. And they stole and lost a lot of money from one of the Emperor's ships, so...
no subject
no subject
Anyone who wants the role is crazy. [Immediately. He crosses his arms, frowning at the now blank screen.] ... I was a scout first, then I ascended through the ranks and was given the role. But... I guess it's not inaccurate to say I was raised for it, too.
week five, monday.
Meanwhile, Hunter is standing near the staircase leading up to the throne, looking very much like he wants to set the whole room on fire.]
Is this another illusion...?
no subject
Something like that, perhaps! I'm really not sure how this place works.
[ his gaze finally settles on hunter. ]
You've been here before, I take it?
[ since it sure isn't his memories they pulled this out of, even if the vibe isn't entirely unfamiliar. ]
no subject
[A bit stiffly. The heart continues to thump, thump, thump away, loud as hell.]
What direction did you come from? I thought the door was over there, but...
[He gestures at a wall.]
no subject
and looks back to the heart. ]
Is that being used as some kind of power source, or just a creative decoration choice?
no subject
No, that's the Titan's heart. The castle's in the chest, so they built around it.
week five, saturday.
Hey, Mephisto. Hunter is just standing here looking at the gift shop kigus like he's considering committing acts of unspeakable kigu violence. Flapjack softly warbles at him from where he's perched on his shoulder.]
no subject
The lively scene this place saw last night seems pretty far behind us now, hm?
no subject
It feels like it happened years ago, not the other night.
no subject
And as long a day as today was, it apparently wasn't long enough.
We got too caught up in the drama of what was happening to finish looking at all the facts.
no subject
no subject
In fairness — though it doesn't excuse the oversight — this situation seems to have been different from any we'd encountered previously. Having more than two people awake with only one death wasn't an idea we'd had to give much thought to.
no subject
no subject
no subject
[He sighs.]
I wish we had more information to narrow it down. We forgot to check the costumes for size, though.
week 6, monday
Getting a bit of an early start, hm? Though as they say, it's 5 o'clock somewhere.
[ is hell all on one time zone? who cares. ]
no subject
Why does it matter if it's 5 o'clock or not?
no subject
[ the pinkish bubblegum-scented drink he'd ordered a moment ago shows up on the counter in front of him, and he slides the menu over to hunter. ]
...Anyway, there's your human cultural lesson for the day.
no subject
Oh. That... makes sense. I guess. [Hm.] How long have you lived among humans? You know a lot about them.
no subject
Oh, a few thousand years, off and on!
no subject
Wait. How old are you?
no subject
no subject
How are so many of you so old?
[the immortals are real and they are out there]
1/2
[ takes a sip of his drink! ]
...Oh, this one is—
2/2
and he is now an animal crossing dog. ]
...I see!
week 7, friday
Hmm. What were "not dogs" made out of, again?
no subject
Spiders. Why?
no subject
Are they good?
no subject
no subject
They're not ground up or anything? Just loose spiders?
no subject
[they are probably like......... spider blobs on a bun.]
no subject
Do you want one?