[ isn't that kind of your job description, minus the tentacles?
anyway, this takes... maybe a moment longer than it should, but finally he emerges in his baggy trunks and t-shirt, with a towel draped around his arms like a stole, which isn't weird at all. ]
How many regular human criminals do you know that have tentacles? [ … ] Actually don’t answer that, I’m not sure if I want to know or not.
[ criminals are a slimy as sea creatures though, so there’s that.
date takes one last long look at the mystery man on his trunks — they will remain a mystery, forever. and then he shrugs and makes his own way into the changing room.
it’s going to take him a hot minute as well — he doesn’t have a towel to drape around himself, or a t-shirt he just has the trunks and a lack of self preservation in the face of hell sun.
he probably looks like a 90s rap video, these trunks are only hanging on in there by the sheer determination of the ties around the waist. there’s a distinct chance a hefty gust of wind could cause a minor marilyn monroe moment.
That mystery man should be honored to be a part of such a stunning sight.
[ and actually that reminds him to grab some shades (which clash pretty horribly with patrick's shade of pink) off a rack for himself before they leave.
he slides them on and looks around for a moment. ]
...You know, everything really does look more pleasant through these!
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The face seems a little familiar, but I'm not sure if I've seen it before or if he just happens to have a generic celebrity look.
[ anyway!! he does a little twirl with the spongebob trunks held high. ]
Pretty impressive, right? I'm sure we'll send the krakens jet-propelling themselves away in shame.
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[ he turns the trunks to Look at this mystery man. who are you? (it's a random stock photo). who ARE you?
oh well the twirl gets appropriate slow clap applause. ]
Very impressive. But they'll see you coming a mile off, so maybe prepare for that.
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You’ve met our new friend in the bar here, right? Hopefully your audience won’t be related.
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These aren't my first krakens.
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Alright, alright. Not everyone fights evil — with or without tentacles — for a living.
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Aren't you a cop or something?
[ isn't that kind of your job description, minus the tentacles?
anyway, this takes... maybe a moment longer than it should, but finally he emerges in his baggy trunks and t-shirt, with a towel draped around his arms like a stole, which isn't weird at all. ]
Your turn!
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[ criminals are a slimy as sea creatures though, so there’s that.
date takes one last long look at the mystery man on his trunks — they will remain a mystery, forever. and then he shrugs and makes his own way into the changing room.
it’s going to take him a hot minute as well — he doesn’t have a towel to drape around himself, or a t-shirt he just has the trunks and a lack of self preservation in the face of hell sun.
and a stylish pair of sunglasses which are absolutely on his face when he emerges.
he probably looks like a 90s rap video, these trunks are only hanging on in there by the sheer determination of the ties around the waist. there’s a distinct chance a hefty gust of wind could cause a minor marilyn monroe moment.
but he is here and he is beach appropriate. ]
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That mystery man should be honored to be a part of such a stunning sight.
[ and actually that reminds him to grab some shades (which clash pretty horribly with patrick's shade of pink) off a rack for himself before they leave.
he slides them on and looks around for a moment. ]
...You know, everything really does look more pleasant through these!
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[ he squints through his. ]
Mine are just making everything look dim. [ … ] Hang on.
[ he’s going back in to find a better pair give him a moment. ]
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[ moment granted, he'll look at dumb beach hats. ]
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Yeah? Do you still see another weekend of nine hour trials and executions with them on? Asking for a friend.
[ the friend is him. ]
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[ a bit of a head tilt as he looks over the new glasses. ]
Those are fun. Do they come in blue?
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[ HE WISHES THEY COULD DO THAT but his conscience won't let him not invetigate for the truth.
he looks over them like he's in mean girls. ]
Yeah, there's... [ mentally counting ] So many colours. I definitely saw light blue and darker blue ones.
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[ solely to be an absolute bitch and troll yukio if he can take them with them. ]
Well, are we ready? I grabbed a few snacks from the convenience store on the way over.
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[ yeah he's definitely grabbing like four more so he can just show up to school events with them on and make mizuki yell at him. ]
Sure. If we squint really hard maybe we'll forget we're literally on the beaches of hell. [ yaaaay beach break. nothing wrong here. ]